A Poem: To Whom am I Bound?

All of these things make my soul so cold

How come they are not getting old?

But Jesus

Has granted me the power

To be bold

To say no

Why is it that the hardest person to say no to

Is myself

And, damn,

I hate asking for help.

I hate how I am not God.

And I hate

That I hate that

Who am I

To demand so much control

Yet when it is “granted”

I take no responsibility

I impolitely decline

True Sadness, by the Avett Brothers

Really hits

When I find myself like this


Help me be okay with the fact

That I will always be a mess

And that you don’t love me any less

Because your blood is priceless

Forgive me for believing

The same lies I always do

I philia you Lord,

But you know all things

All I can ask

Is that you move in me

Please, please move


Why am I like this

You say, “I made you this way,

One day, you’ll see why.”

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